I woke up with a start, not from bed , but from my desk at work after falling asleep precariously on my keyboard on a busy Monday morning. It took me some time to realize my desk phone was screaming for attention for almost a minute now…
”Crap, bloody DBA guys!!, cant a lady sleep in here” I mumbled to myself.
Before I answered the call, I took a glance at the callerID screen thingy, It was a mobile number, Fishy!!
Yes, you are talking to Kavitha Mahalingam”,
And then next 20 minutes went like a haze, like in one of those tamil movies…where they show a scene which rewinds to sometime in the past, flashing blurred reel after reel in black and white. There was an amazing amount of monologue in deep husky voice ,a lot of comedy in between which I had difficulty catching up, ones or twice my dad was mentioned and..alot of “Mmmms , OKs and Ahhhan’s” from my side. ….
It was all going over my head,and then I came back to my senses.Wait a minute…This is my office,my desk, my fone and I am incharge of all crappings. No one craps to me.Alrighty…Here we go,..I mightily cleared my throat and still croaked
“ Im sorry, Who am I talking to?”
The person on the other side was quite dumb struck evident from the fact that there was no response for the next 5 seconds .It was like how a public speaker setup for the Amman koil thiruvizha was suddenly plugged off . I gave a “ I-am-the-boss-around-here” kinda smile to myself, But not for long.
He piped up “ comedy panatheenga” (Comeon, don’t joke!)
“Comedy-aa??, ..What the heck, Im serious as a trauma patient ”…I blurted.
Thanks to my impromptu humor, the next half a minute went in maniacal laughter from the other end.i sweared silently and waited for another minute for him to catch his breath and they he said,
“ I saw your profile on a matrimony site, I really liked your profile..and I’m also working for the same company as yours…So, I called your residence number and spoke to your dad and he was pretty OK.,and I thought I’ll give you a call as well and catch up,”
Given below are the points which actually pulled me back from my sleep
- Point 1: My profile on a matrimony site (What the F**k)
- Point2:He liked my profile (Are you freaking kidding me??? ROFL)
- Point3: My dad was pretty OK?? (what is going on in the world ??)
Frankly, I was in loss of words…
“Are you the father of the son”, I asked and immediately regretted for asking the question
Another 2 minutes went a maniacal laugh as I drummed my fingers on the desk for it to cease.
“No kavi, Im the groom, I don’t believe in parents looking for matches for their sons/daughters, I like to have an upper hand in anything I do, I think you will agree with me”
I gave a nervous smile, and replied “I think, It will be best to talk to my dad” and I knew, that was not only the most apt answer but also a “Im-not-ready-for-this” kind of one.
During all this fiasco, I completely forgot I was at work, and cubicles are disturbingly separated by a flimsy wall.Even anything as small as a hiccup would be amplified beyond proportions across the entire bay area and everyone in 10 meter radius had behind the scene access to my entire phone conversation which I came to know when my teammate greeted me with a wide smile on her face.
Finally, the caller decided to hang up, after listening to “I think, It will be best to talk to my dad” a zillion times. He mournfully bid goodbye, like a warrior seeing off his wife on deathbed
I felt awful about myself, and embarrassed at the same time…But I cudnt help myself from asking the question that was burning in me throughout the call,.
“HOW THE HELL, DID YOU GET MY NUMBER..dude”