Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Monday 6th Apr 09

PRELUDE:Monday blues, not just blue…but all shades of blue, sky blue,demin blue, ujala blue..

Another boring week was in the making, nothing has changed for the better.Wakeup, brush, watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S,raid wardrobe, kick bike,drive, curse a few ppl, read horoscope, sleep in meetings, come home. Its been monotonously boring like this. Nothing has changed. Not even the ways I get bored.

It was yet another blue Monday . I was driving to work down the kotturpuram road, with a glazed eye and linkin park blaring in my ears.While I drive, these are the rules: I see nothing,-I hear nothing - I speak nothing(except a few swear words). My bike has a mind of its own having realized that the owner doesn’t , it works and drives on its own accord.Jumps at respective signals , overtakes in respective places, honks at respective vehicles. Until oneday, I realized my bike also adjusts its rear view mirror to see objects behind it better. Note the point: OBJECTS as in tall, husky things driving sport bikes. And so my bike did what it does best when it sees these objects. IT STOPPED… and That’s when I saw him.

(did I forget to mention, the object of this post is a BOY.Yes, a boy, a man, a guy, a dude whatever)

30kmphr . Not more than that, was the speed he was driving in.I was atleast 20 feet ahead of him. Trying to catch a quick glimpse of this magnificent creation of god ...hehe, I quickly wiped some non existent filth off my right rear view mirror with my bare hands.During this time, he zoomed past me with an incredible amount of engine sound (despite, Linkin park still blaring in my fones). I needed to catch up.I left my right hand to do the wiping of my mirror and left hand raced the accelerator by almost 360 degress and before I knew it, I zoomed past him and there he was again in the focus my mirror. I smiled to my self ever so proudly of my driving skills. I saw him coming closer just behind me, 15 feet, 10 feet, 8, 7,6,5,4….

What the hell was that??? Holy crap, he was wearing one of those helmet, tat makes u look like your returning to earth after a space mission. The one which has the fully covered face mask kinda thing.All Black! Y would anyone want to hide a face like his,it was injustice to weak hearted girls like me. And in seconds, he went past me again. All I saw was his white funny skeleton sticker at the back on his black helmet. Phew L!!!!

Neverthless the chase was not over, “Here I come helmet boy” and raced my accelerator and snaked my way through the traffic clogged road closely keeping an eye for him. It wasn’t really easy to lose him with all the morning traffic and all that. Thanks to his nosiy BULLET thing he was driving., his machine was a head turner.

I don’t last remember the time, I was involved in a high speed chase like this (Having chased by traffic constables at nandanam signal many times, but that’s a different issue all together). In the Next 5-7 minutes I had pushed my bike to its breaking point not to mention my skills as a driver. I was confident, I will somehow catch up with him and get a glimpse of his face or whatever!!!

Vroooom, Vroom….was all I heard!!! Constantly keeping in sight, there he was just 30 feet ahead of me.

And that’s when I saw, we were approaching a signal at madhaya kailash, It was green and counting down from 10 seconds…10,9,8,7,6,5,4…..

My pea-sized brain,quickly tried to figure all parameters together…,

Velocity=distance/time taken

=approx(30meters)/8 secs à 353435.3454 (huh???)…I should be driving a rocket or travelling at the speed of light to cross the signal before it turns red (I know, I suck in physics!!!!)

That’s when I realized, he already went past the signal, and I was stuck for the next 120 secs behind the stop line as the LED counter started ticking down. So, much for my high speed chasing, So much for all the overtaking, speeding,So much for my dream man!!! I saw the white skeleton sticker growing smaller in size and he gained more distance from me. And he was gone in no time……………

I looked up to the skies and asked “Y god Y?????? “ why are u doing this to me???..There was no voice to answer as its always been. Life was always been this hard and painful!...Dont I deserve a small teeny tiny ray of hope. Again “why god why????? “..And Golly…I was back to my monotonous boring days!!!!

I waited for the next 2mins, pondering about all the ill luck I’ve had in life. Green light was back on, and I slowly accelerated and proceeded my ever boresome commute to my office. It was a hot dry day clearly opposite to how gloomy and cold I was feeling.All feelings of loneliness, insecurity , hopelessness came rushing back…..Anyways Life like that!!!!

Just when I was about to take the detour to my workplace.I saw the white skeleton again. I did a double take. The bike was parked at the roadside and the black helmet was on the seat. And there he was standing next to his bike, with a smile on his face looking in my direction.

Oh my God!!!! I frantically looked around to see, if he was really looking at me, or someone behind my shoulders as it has always turns out to be in numerous occasions. There was not a soul in the vicinity. He then causually raised his hand and waved and said a soft “Hi”. He looked like ones of those shirtless blokes in “Old Spice” ads.

I was literraly gaping at him and in no time, I raced my bike and took the detour and went the usual road to my office without a glance or thought of him. I dunno y I did that but …Basic girl Insticncts I guess!

6-foot frame, half shaved, rugged jeans and a black roudneck t-shirt…and a silly smile on his face looking at ME.What more can I ask for?!?!?!...I can stay single for the rest of my life for precious moments like these. I hummed “Its raining Men” all the way to work. That particular Monday was no longer blue!! :) :)

NOTE: This was an unpublished post for a long time for reasons that I don't give a damn anymore!

Friday, September 18, 2009

His smile says it all....

I really dunno who the kid is.This is a mail I got from my practise head.The kid's smile sure lights up my day.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Priceless Feeling!


Its not abt winning or losing
Its not abt hangin on or letting it go
Its not abt loving enuf or loving more
Its not abt the missing or the company
Its not abt the sweet nothings or manythings

Someday, I'm finally gonna let go
Cause i know there's a better way
And i wanna know wats over that rainbow
I'm gonna get out of here someday, someday!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Appy birrrrrrrthday lachumi.....

She's the blackness of the eye
She's the epitome of all the joy
She's the profanity of my sanity
She's the humbleness of all my vanity
She's the truth in every myth
She's the myth in every truth
She's the rain inside an umbrella
She's Hari's own cindrella ;)
She's the glare of the unshined diamond
She's the softness of the hard almond
And lux, and thats who u are! my friend!
Happy birthday babe!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are
As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends
-Greenday

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Sleeplessness

2:30 am and sleeplessness is not a very combination.As it happened in many nights lately, i jerked my eyes open at 2:30 like one of those possesed girls in a horror flick.I hate it when i do that.Honestly,It scares the crap out of me.On an average night, i wud be tossing myself around the sheets gaping at the ceiling fan or sitting at the edge of the bed looking down at my toes wondering if i need a pedi.Well tonight i decided to peak a boo at this neglected blog of mine.

There was once a time, when i used to blog late into the night.Regular updates,trying all sorts of templates, adding every possible widget under the sun.Not that this place was thronged with bloggers.But i had a small audience to keep myself happy and wanting to update this space regularly.I still vividly remember, how insecure i felt about publishing any post.

I miss blogging, i miss writing my heart out, I miss the happy feel i get when i jus let my fingers run amok on the keyboard.Ive never really fancied writing that much until i started blogging.But for some reasons i cudnt come up with anything for the past couple of months or so.Or the crap i did write doesnt really count.I'm never really busy in doing things i love to do.Its my way of living.But going thro some jigsawed phase at the moment.Its like i've been blind folded for a while and then when the folds are finally taken off, and you feel that disturbing sun in your eyes.Stinging but your glad the folds are off. Difficult period to cope with for the past few weeks trying to compartmentalize all the things that had happened. And trying to figure out why it happened. Lots of questions went unanswered.Lots of tears went un dried. Well, at the end of the day,atleast I'm happy with what i have and didnt lose much! Atleast I’m happy the way I lead my life.


I draw inspiration from a lot of things around, the flowers that bloom without water on my terrace, the kids I play ball with, the kites that I gaze upon every Sunday afternoon, the occasional chat I have with strangers in local bus, forward SMSs from friends,the comments i get on my posts,marina beach,my books,my playlist ,my aunt, my friend,my sister.It is these things in life that I look forward and wont disappoint in cheering up my spirit.

Well,I love writing here and will continue to do so. My blog and me are here to stay!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Pretend to hide
Those tears of wrath now denied
Belligerence aroused along her stride
Pretend to hide as she cried.

Cast down by a nefarious soul
Life,amputated by a game so foul
Squealing,morrow melodies of despair
Nursed a bleeding heart forever so bare.

Nightmares of days of frolick with the unknown
Thro burns of the cold,timelessly grown.
Felt the pain, thro gritted teeth
When the mute music abruptly ceased.

Light years of silence loudly pressed.
A vagabond thro day and night.
With sabotaged spirit so damp and still
Here i wait with baited breath for an angelic kill.